RBT’s Countryside Delights

‘Now then, when you reach the door look very closely, for if there is a sign saying “No Boots” or “No Dogs” this is a warning that it will possibly not be as welcoming as you’d expect.’

I’m not sure whether it was growing up in a small Kentish village which sported seven pubs and was set amongst acres of hop gardens and a multitude of oast houses, or indeed whether it was my early introduction to the delights of ale by my late father, having just caught my first brown trout on a fly from the little river Teise in Horsmonden which has left me with a lifelong love of the stuff!

A Traditional Kentish Pint, & In A Jug!

Aside from my passion for angling and birdwatching, finding the perfect country pub has been quite an obsession over the years, which perhaps to the casual drinker may seem a little odd. As far and as wide as my travels have taken me the campaign for real ale guide to the best of British pubs has never been far from my side. A quick flick through can often be assured of pointing me in the right direction to sample a good pint, although there have been occasions where this hasn’t been the case and either the ale is not up to the expected standard, the pub has been turned into an upmarket eatery or it has closed for good.

So, what in my humble opinion makes the perfect country hostelry? Well let’s start with the location, the more tucked away and off the well-trodden track it is generally assures that you will be greeted by what I regard as the local crowd, usually an eclectic mix of old and young who view the passing ale drinker not with suspicion but with a welcoming smile and some warm gentle banter, making one feel quite at home in their company. The building itself for me is also of great importance and the older the better, whether it has a thatched roof and built from brick and daub, local stone with a slate roof as found in some parts or in Kent more likely weather boarded or tile hung with a clay peg tiled roof, I like a building which could tell a thousand tales, one with character and history which exudes a certain warmth before the threshold is even crossed.

A Most Welcome Sign

Now then, when you reach the door look very closely, for if there is a sign saying “No Boots” or “No Dogs” this is a warning that it will possibly not be as welcoming as you’d expect.  As a countryman and angler, a pub full of like-minded gum booted, waxed or tweed jacketed attired regulars along with a good sprinkling of well-behaved dogs and not a sight of a pair of sports trainers or jogging bottoms being worn is a good measure of how quaffable the ale will be.

Fancy continental lagers with unpronounceable names will probably be reserved for those with little regard or knowledge of what a good ale really tastes like and all the better for those of us who enjoy tasting proper beer from a dimpled pint jug as opposed to a straight glass, and it is worth noting that the more ale a pub sells the better it usually tastes. The Landlord of such an establishment will often be a connoisseur of fine ales himself and will have mastered the ability to look after them for his customers.

Inglenook, Part Of The Very Fabric Of A Traditional Pub

Now the good pub in winter will need a fireplace, an Inglenook is particularly ideal for a reasonable gathering of kindred spirits to warm and dry themselves after a day spent out working, fishing or shooting in inclement weather and space should always be afforded for a dog or two to enjoy the glow emitting from the sizzling logs.

Around the fire much discussion and laughter will be heard, some of the tales will be familiar to you even if you are from out of the area and gradually you’ll find that you are included in the chatter if it is a pub with a welcoming ambience.

The bar will be full of old local artefacts some with long forgotten stories and rather puzzling, others like the gentle chatter will be more familiar drawing you in and easing your possibly at first mild feelings of being out of place. Not for me the modern minimalist look and feel, I want to feel like I’m at home surrounded by the past, which is what I often tell my marginally older partner…and then I duck!

The Obligatory ‘Open Fire’ A Must In Winter

During the summertime the same pub will be found to be no different, the fire though will no longer crackle and spit, the windows will be open to let the scent of the climbing roses drift through. The gum boots will have been replaced with stout walking shoes and the jackets discarded for checked shirts of varying colours. The talk amongst the locals will have changed from sowing crops and producing logs to the impending harvest. The weather though, being British will always be on their lips, too hot, too cold, too wet, too dry, some things like old pubs never change, but isn’t that the beauty when the world around these little hubs of peace and tranquillity is running riot?

Our Editors Favourite Kentish Summer Tipple

Let us now talk about ale, a simple enough mix of water, fermented and sometimes roasted malts, hops and yeast but you may ask, there are so many different brews, this is indeed true. Bitter, mild, brown ale, pale ale, old ale, stout, porter, ruby ale, Indian pale ale and amongst just those few that I’ve mentioned, brewers across the length and breadth of these isles will craft their own magic to produce very individual tastes, aromas and colours for each one of them by carefully mixing hop and malt blends. During the spring and summer months lighter refreshing tasting ales on the palate are found to be generally more enjoyable, think pale ale, light ale, bitter and IPA and in the depths of winter dark ales such as ruby, porter and stout are enough to warm one’s inner core from a biting wind or haw frost.

An Autumnal Classic, Shepherd Neame’s ‘Late Red’

Many brewers produce seasonal ales, here in Kent, our local brewery allow us a short autumn window to enjoy their “Late Red” but an ale of such outstanding quality means that it doesn’t last long in this neck of the woods! Many ales have been given rather special names, some in reference the local area, others with a nod to a figure of some importance associated with the area, others can be totally bizarre! But all without doubt give a particular ale a name rarely forgotten.

Characters… not only should the pub have character as I’ve hopefully outlined in the previous ramblings, but it should have some drinking folk who bring with them their charm and warmth too. Old Jack springs instantly to mind, a lovely man, a smallholder and country born bred and died, God rest his soul, brought many a laugh into the bar of the Chequers Inn. Jack, you see used to bring with him quite often one of his livestock, which could be a goat, a piglet or on more than one occasion a chicken, I kid you not! I once asked him “why all the livestock in the pub Jack?” “Livestock?” he retorted with a big grin “what do you call that?” pointing at my dog…there was of no reasonable answer!

Then of course there will invariably be in every country pub “the huddle”, the huddle usually comprises of elderly gents and occasionally ladies who spend their drinking hours playing cards or dominos and putting the world to rights, occasionally you may, if standing close by, be asked to give your opinion on some matter or the other, best I always say to sit on the fence unless of you have had time to gauge the direction of flow and general consensus beforehand…on more than one occasion I’ve got it totally wrong!

Don’t be at all surprised as well if after carefully parking your vehicle after a day’s angling to leave the pub and find it blocked in by a tractor and trailer or a plough whilst Andrew the farm hand has popped in for a couple of quick libations either after work or…. pre- work…this is known to happen, quite frequently!Enjoy your pint, treasure the pub and keep these countryside delights open and thriving, they are very much part of our national heritage. Bye for now, I’m off up the lane with the dog for a jar or two…and yes, I’m wearing my wellies!

Writing & Images RBT – The Weald Of Kent, February 2022